Dear Fighter: 5 Signs You’re Stronger Than You Know

The Strength You Didn’t Know Was Showing

There was this one afternoon—I’d just come back from a painfully awkward conversation with someone I used to admire (past tense now, thanks), and I sat in my car in the Target parking lot, blasting sad girl music and crying over a protein bar I dropped on the floor. Not even a good one. One of those dry ones that taste like guilt and cardboard.

That’s when I whispered to myself, with a dramatic sigh and a runny nose, “Get it together.” But weirdly enough? That was strength. Quiet. Underrated. Not shiny at all. But real.

We like to think of strength as this loud, muscles-flexed, superhero moment. Cue theme music, cape blowing in the wind, life falling into place like a Pinterest board.

But strength—real strength—is often so boringly human, it gets missed.

It’s sending the email even when your chest is tight.
It’s saying “I’m fine” and meaning “I’m broken but trying.”
It’s not quitting, even when your brain is screaming that quitting would be easier.

We don’t always recognize it because it doesn’t come with applause. No one throws a parade because you made it out of bed today when your soul was dragging behind you like a wet towel. But it counts. God, it counts more than we give ourselves credit for.

And that’s what this post is: a little love letter to the parts of you that keep going quietly.

Maybe today you feel anything but strong. Maybe your mascara’s smudged, your inbox is giving “emotional damage,” and your brain’s looping worst-case scenarios like a playlist on shuffle.

But here’s the thing I need you to know: you are stronger than you know.

Not in the Pinterest-quote way. Not in the “stay strong!” kind of way that sounds nice on a mug but feels like pressure in real life. I mean it in the “you’re still here” way. In the “you’re fighting battles no one sees and still showing up” kind of way.

I wrote this for the version of you that doubts her own power. For the version that feels like she’s crawling while everyone else is thriving. For the version that feels tired, unseen, and a little over it.

Because strength doesn’t always roar. Sometimes it whimpers. Sometimes it cries on the kitchen floor. And sometimes, it’s the quiet decision to try again anyway.

If you’ve been wondering if you’re actually doing okay—or if you’re secretly stronger than you give yourself credit for—these five signs might feel like a warm nudge. Not from some expert with a 10-step plan. From me. Someone who’s cried in public restrooms and still thinks that counts as progress.

Let’s talk about what strength really looks like. The invisible kind. The kind you carry in your bones even when everything feels heavy.

Keep reading, dear fighter. You might just recognize yourself.

1. You’ve Cried, Paused, and Still Chosen to Show Up

There’s a weird kind of strength in the moments no one sees. Like crying in the bathroom, fixing your eyeliner, and then returning to the Zoom meeting pretending everything’s fine. (Spoiler: It wasn’t. But you still showed up.)

We don’t give that kind of courage enough credit. You could’ve called it quits. You could’ve said, “I can’t today.” But something in you—maybe stubbornness, maybe hope, maybe just muscle memory—got you back in motion.

Showing up when you don’t feel ready is emotional bravery. It means you haven’t given up on yourself, even when everything feels fragile. It means something inside you still believes there’s more ahead.

You might not recognize it as strength, but I do.

2. You’re Still Kind—Even After What You’ve Been Through

Let’s be real: Life can be a jerk. People disappoint. Plans unravel. And yet… you still hold doors open, text friends back, and maybe even smile at strangers when your heart feels like it’s on fire.

That’s not weakness. That’s not naivety. That’s resilience dressed as kindness.

You’re stronger than you know because your softness survived.
After all the hard, you didn’t shut down. You didn’t turn cold. You kept choosing warmth, even when it would’ve been easier to build walls.

If your empathy made it through the fire, that’s no accident. That’s proof of your strength. Quiet. Defiant. Beautiful.

3. You Keep Getting Back Up—Even If You Do It Slowly

Let me say this loud for the tired girls in the back: getting back up doesn’t have to look graceful. You can wobble. You can trip. You can scream into your pillow first.

But the fact that you still get up at all? That’s strength in its rawest form.

There’s power in trying again after disappointment. In rebuilding after something falls apart. In reimagining your life when the version you had planned disappears.

Some people won’t see it. They’ll only notice the comeback when it looks shiny. But I see it in the messy middle—the sticky, slow, one-breath-at-a-time part.

That’s where your strength lives. Right there in the shaky steps.

4. You’ve Learned to Sit With the Unknown

This one hurts a little, doesn’t it?

Because sitting in uncertainty is like trying to meditate while your brain is auditioning for a drama series. “What if I fail?” “What if it never gets better?” “What if I end up on a weird reality show about my mess?”

Still, you’re here. You haven’t run away from the not-knowing. You’re holding space for the hard stuff. That takes serious emotional muscle.

You’re stronger than you know because you’ve stopped demanding answers and started building peace in the pause.

It’s not flashy. No one throws a party for patience. But it’s one of the bravest things you can do: stay open-hearted in the middle of your maybe.

5. You Haven’t Let the Hard Days Define Your Worth

This one hits too close. Because it’s easy—so easy—to let bad days tell you who you are.

Didn’t finish your to-do list? You’re lazy.
Didn’t text back fast enough? You’re flaky.
Cried over nothing? You’re dramatic.

Lies. All of it.

Your hard days are not a reflection of your value. They’re just part of the story—not the whole narrative.

The fact that you keep reminding yourself (even when it feels untrue) that you matter? That’s strength.

It means you’re rewriting the script. It means you’re learning to give yourself grace. And it means you’re finally realizing that your worth is not up for debate.

Why This Really Matters

It’s so easy to forget that inner strength isn’t loud. It doesn’t come with fireworks or praise. Most of the time, it just… shows up quietly in the corner of your day.

But when you recognize it—when you actually see yourself being brave without the performance—you start to trust yourself a little more.

You start to think, Maybe I’m not failing. Maybe I’m just fighting through.
You start to believe, Maybe I don’t need to prove anything to be enough.

And that’s everything.

Because the way you carry yourself through the unglamorous moments? The nights when no one’s clapping? The mornings when it takes five alarms and two pep talks to get out of bed?

That’s where the real transformation lives.

Once you start to see your strength, you don’t just survive—you start to own your story. Not because it’s neat or tidy. But because it’s yours.

Conclusion: You, Stronger Than You Know

I don’t know what today looks like for you.
Maybe you’re thriving.
Maybe you’re trying.
Maybe you’re just… tired.

But I know this: you are stronger than you know.

Not because you did something epic or heroic. But because you’ve been showing up for your life, even when it’s messy. You’ve stayed kind, soft, stubborn, hopeful—even if only in tiny flickers.

That’s strength.

So here’s your permission to breathe.

You don’t need to earn rest. You don’t need to fix everything by Thursday. You don’t need to glow up or boss up or level up before the weekend.

You’re allowed to just be. And still be strong.

And if no one’s told you lately, let me be the one: I’m proud of you. You are doing so much better than you think.

Now go drink water, cry if you need, laugh at a meme, and keep being your resilient, ridiculous, beautiful self.

Your strength is not waiting to be built. It’s already here.

You’re living proof.